-=| Ahh!... |=-
This is gonna be a hate entrie, so things written below r “trash”… so pls… DUN READ it as it is poison…
I’m very furious at the bloody skool’s computer…=/… some stupid Korean Student or was it China student installed some Chinese lettering formatting thingy… n I could not write any entrie yesterday… all my words appeared widely spaced…maybe the computer was actually kinda preventing me from writing this entrie or wad…
I have been thinking lots this weekend as many stuff has happened…n it’s all abt my dad… this dad of mine is really getting on my nerves…he is currently 50+ n is goin thru menopause… it is said tat when people get older they will go thru a 2nd childhood… he is always very jealous, destructive and full of assumptions…
Being 50 over years old, he has juz got a REAL job this year, as a security assistant… 4 the beginning of his life he juz worked at the Keppel ship yard… n then worked as a co porter 4 a long long time till he retired as a “sales man”… I feel tat even wif so much work experiences he has not really worked in a real job(never faces office politics b4)… I dun think he has ever received so much sarcastic remarks from the people in the community n stuff(hello… it’s the 21st century… everyone is affected by the business world)… facing so much stress he comes home n vend his anger on us at home by picking out small mistakes like forgetting to off the toilet light or maybe clearing the dinner boxes late… if nuttin is wrong at home he would keep on discriminating the tv’s programme (say it over n over again till someone tries gets annoyed n prove him wrong[to shut him up], to get some convo goin), saying tat it’s not according to God’s law…his principal of life is tat if it is not set up by Christians aka Adventist it is evil… wadever which is not from God is from the devil… although I know it’s stated in the bible n I’ve learnt it in bible lessons but juz tat he can’t put everything word 4 word….
I feel tat he is a jealous man… not like God being a jealous God… but a father being jealous of his wife, children… he used to not allow my mum n sis to buy bright coloured clothes like red, pink, yellow etc. but sum how it got out of hand… jealous of me getting to have lunch out wif my mum on fridaes… spending sat nites in relatives place till the wee hours in the morning… I get to eat chocolates n ice cream or maybe wear nice clothes(which he can't wear)…when my mum buys or does this stuff he gets real jealous n tries n do sumthin childish to get my mum’s attention… the white patch on my face is also one of his works… I wonder is it because he was jealous of my nice skin or my features… n oh yeah I heard from my mum tat I was born wif 2 side burns… n the nurses in the hospital finds me very cute… n when I reached home he shaved me bald… causing my hair to be thick n rough…. He disfigured me..
He is very destructive… he actually destroyed our house’s interior… by hanging lots of painting on all the walls till it is full…. Dunno wad he was up to… now the house looks very heavy….
He is very assumptious…. Thinking tat he is always rite n u r always wrong… he steals my chocolates from the fridge n anything nice I buy home… his reason is tat ur mum gave u the pocket money n I have the right to eat it… wadever stupid crap…. U noe wad old man… I HATE U…
Since young I was dragged to church n I hated it… u chose my clothes n my shoes n everything… it was NEVER my choice to go to church…. N it’s still not…. Bible studies was also never my choice… my mum searched 4 a bible teacher 4 me… n now they r askin 4 my baptism…. Wad should I do man…. Goin to church, skool n coming home has different masks to wear…n when they meet…. A disaster…
Im already 17 n I’m still not allowed to choose wad I want to do…. he is controlling my life juz like a 3 year old kid...These parents r driving me crazy…. N I dun think I can take the preasure any longer…. Sumbody save me outta here…. I noe this is not the worst misery… but I have enuff…..
J O E| 7:25 PM |
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-=| Back to skool... |=-
Going back to skool means trimming hair.... hmmm i've got the hair stylist to shave off my sides n back... n now i look like a squidwert from spounge bob....=S... hope it will look better when it's longer.... hmmm i'm now considering of doing tat spiked up hair thingy.... but it's a waste as i can onli spike my hair once a week.... leaving my head looking hexagonal 4 skool.... i think it'll look worst then squidwert.....=S
Well i went to Thomson last sat... n ya many peepz did ask me y am i here.... yes n it included my parrents... aniwayz juz wanted to pop by church/skool to see any major changes.... usually the skool would do some major changes through the holidayz.... n the skool juz created a sercurity booth.... hmmm our skool is now turning into a condo...
i've been thinking over stuff... time is running out... ahh... i always have this really bad procrastinating attitude tat i can onli study last minute.... study so early oso no use... i'll 4get everything....tat is when exams r really far away...
when exams r near my attitude is like, study last minute oso no use... cannot cram everything wif such little time.... aniwayz wad i learn in skool is gathered in my mind n tat is wad i can remember when i enter the hall...
in the end i end up watching tv n wasting my time away... n didn't study at all lo.... haiyoh...
n i oso juz received tis letter from mindef asking me to join army or if i'm still studying i muz go into the internet to tell them so.... this tells me tat i'm getting old...=/... n torture is comin up.... gawd save me!.... ahh... stupid crap...
so manythings r comin up... n wad shall i do?...
J O E| 8:33 PM |
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-=| Finally! |=-
one thing very depressing was my b'day... tat day was the most "boresome" day i ever had... since my internet connection sway sway ended at the beggining of my examz... i had to adapt to the changes...the whole day was stoning at the tv... listening to songs like "lonely" on the radio as it toped he muzic charts.... ahhh! it was torturous...but i "ren" endured...
The day after my b'day was a very good one... i went out wif Pearlene 4 lunch to elebrate my "belated" b'day... it's been 2 years since i've set down n toked to her... so we went to mache to eat... first time in there n the food was... va va voom... oysters, musscles, sea food, unclean food... but i didn't eat those la... eat spegetti wif out clams n musscles....=/
Had a longlong tok abt wad happened throughout the 2 years... got to know som information... but i shall not anounce it here....=p
oh n tat weekend was the 3 day 2 nite survivor camp... it was absolutely horrendously torturous... i didn't expect the nite n days were so !@#$%^&*(no words to discribe)...
the food was horrible...eating maggie mee , baked beans n some bread...
The lodging was a prisoner's breakingoff wooden bed...(but okay 4 me... not as bad as tent...)
The bath was terrible... no bath curtain but got curtain pole... ahh but anywayz got extra flat sheets Wayne used it to cover all the "doors"...
wif all these they expect us to run n chiong like crazy... surviving on 1 packet of maggie noodle 4 a meal.... n few hours of slp.... CRAZY!!
but anywayz managed to have some fun... in the camp.... playing games n stuff...
few weeks after the camp... n i still have tat traumatic face.... stoning while i eat my meals...=/
then the holidays i'm having now is the worst... no internt axcess... watching zigy zaggy double visoned distorted humans... listening to buzzy noizes in our radio... as they r changing the electrical wires in the hdb flats... it affected our connection...
sometimes staring at the celling lying on my bed... wondering wad to do... creatve me juz has no idea to do wadever... somethimes wondering to myself is goin back to skool better the "slacking at home" doing nutthin... but lazy me tells me tat having nutthin to do is better then goin to skool... as facing those unsatisfyable teachers is really a imposible task...
i feel tat my life has been smudged by some bad luck... like being very clumsy in the camp... dropping stuff n being blurr was really a torture to me.... my mum went to bangkok during my examz n didn't get anything done on my b'day...n she is planning to go hongkong wif my sis when the skool reopens again...
however there r still some good luck ard... like havin a unsuprised suprise cut cake celebration during cell... n receiving couple of gifts like long sleef t shirt from da cell... a book from Andrew... Beanie from Nick... n many others which i've not written down...
B!0
Name : Joel Xiang Desheng P3RS0N@L!TY
Personality : Flamboyant T@g W!SH3S 3M@!l CURR3NT M00D W3@TH3R F00T PR!NTS !N 3 S@nd R@D!0 ST@T!0NS P@ST R3CORDS L!NKS
DOB : 19th May 1988
Age : 19+
Height : 1.73++m
Weight : Abt 60kg
Zodiac : Dragon
Horroscope : Taurus
Fav Sports : Breathing exercises on the bed every night(snore)
Fav colour : Blue, silver, black
Fav things : Vintage looking stuff...
Hates : People who commands me to do anything
Worst habits : Talking back, bitching...
Best Habits : Obeys house rules
How do u relax : Bitching, complaining, vibrate my ear drums with sound waves from my disc man
One thing tat no one noes abt? : i'm Sentimental...
Three words 2 describe me : Rude Noisy Freak
One liner tat i'm most proud of : Being kind to your enemy means to be cruel to yourself
Moto in life : Look 4 a goal n strife hard
