-=| what i think of my life... |=-
You know when i got up this morning i was so grossed out, i'm actualy sleeping on in a bunk sharing the same room with her, it's totally **** out. that room was so crammy dark and messy, most of all it's so hot,i mean...i... i don't mean hot, hot...but temperature hot, hot. Although theres a fan infront of me blowing at full blast at no. 3 i'm still dying, i'm melting.
Next thing i noticed was the messy vainity table, oh man! it's totally like a tonado juz hit my room, this poor lil guy where i'am in really needs a cleaner. And oh, when i looked at the mirror it was disasterous, i look ... i look like.... freaking shreik. oh my god! this guy needs a total make over, messy hair, messy room.... i'm so totally grossed out. C'mon man look at his sis, at least he has inherited the better genes of the family.
Talking about his family, his dad is freaky, he is not only draggy, long winded, miserish, boring, lame and totally a loser.whats in his mind is "the bible says" and "what god says", boring.
His mom is better, she is known to be fierce, merticulous, fussy and demanding, but at home she is a cleaniness freak, and a fussy complainer, totally a typical mom,mom.
His sis is a mixture of both, she is very gulible, though she denies that, who will? Totally easy prey for cosmetic sales girls, Fiends, fellow working companies. But she is also selfish, easily irritable, and she is a self lover freak. Why do i say that? She constantly takes pictures of herself and posts it wherever she can, she even thinks those pouchy cheeks of hers is a asset, wait till she grows old and see it sag, oh man! the image of her saggin cheeks got stuckin my head.
Bascally the house's interior is a horrible makeover, it's being filled with paintings,pictures, jigsaw puzzle and ugly wooden masks which the dad disfigured the house with, who in the right mind would do that? i wonder....
J O E| 2:20 AM |
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-=| Christmas eve |=-
stuck to the computer till dinner, and wow! there was a huge mountain of take aways. Pizzas and the galic bread and drumplets, KFC chicken and all the mash potato and stuff, Silced up ham(pork), sushi and many more suff piling over the kitchen island. knowing me i'll try to get 1 of everything, and wow very quickly my plates was a like a hill.
At night the other cousins and i went to lot 1 to have a snap at the neoprints. Having fun statueing at our posses for 3 secz to listen to the "ichi ni san ". Doodling with the pictures changing hair colour and eye ball colours, colouring in the backgrounds, and all the sissy girly stuff which people at neoprint booths do.
Returning back to the house and we got stuck to th my humps rap, so the whole night was humping good time, eww ok that sounds gross, it was jolly good time...
J O E| 1:40 AM |
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-=| The best part of the body to feel the temperature of he tea |=-
J O E| 1:35 AM |
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-=| Shaun's teethy smile=) |=-
J O E| 1:32 AM |
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-=| Crazy Jas, looney Shaun and silly me.... |=-
J O E| 1:30 AM |
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-=| WOW! Hungry Shaun n me |=-
J O E| 1:21 AM |
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-=| My Humps |=-
J O E| 8:03 AM |
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-=| My Humps - Black Eyed Peas |=-
What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump,my hump, my lovely little lumps. (Check it out)
I drive theses fuckers crazy i do it on the daily they treat me really nicely they buy me all these ices. Dolce and Gabana, Fiendi and the Donna, Karen they be sharing all the money got me wearing fly. Nigger i aint askin. They say they love my ass 'n,
Seven Jeans, True Religion,
I say no, but they keep givin'
So I keep on takin'
And no I ain't taken. We can keep on datin'
and I keep on demonstrating.
My love, my love, my love, my love
You love my lady lumps,
My hump, my hump, my hump,
My humps they got you,
She's got me spending.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, on me, on me
What you gon' do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What u gon' do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I'm a make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
'Cause of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely lady lumps. (Check it out)
I met a girl down at the disco.
She said hey, hey, hey yea let's go.
I could be your baby, you can be my honey
Lets spend time not my money.
Well mix your milk with my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.
They say I'm really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancin' next to me,
Tryin' to feel my hump, hump.
Lookin' at my lump, lump.
You can look but you can't touch it,
If you touch it I'ma start some drama,
You don't want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don't pull on my hand boy,
You ain't my man, boy,
I'm just tryin' ta dance boy,
And move my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My lovely lady lumps
My lovely lady lumps
My lovely lady lumps
In the back and in the front.
My lovin' got you,
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me and spending time on me.
She's got me spendin'.
(Oh) Spendin' all your money on me, on me, on me.
What u gon' do wit all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get,get,get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump,
What u gon' do wit all that ass?
All that ass in side dem jeans?
I'ma make, make, make, make you scream,
Make u scream, make u scream
What you gon do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I'ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off this hump.
What you gon' do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I'ma make, make, make, make you work
Make you work, work, make you work.
J O E| 7:47 AM |
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-=| Check out this dragosta din tea |=-
J O E| 7:43 AM |
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-=| Here we come for carolling! |=-
Friday, after going to shaun's office, we went to fareast's turkish resraunt to have lunch... u noe tat famous tossing of ice cream turkish man who fools his customers of grabing the cones of the icecream n stuff...
i've practically observed that he will first ask u for wad flavour of ice cream u want. Nutthing fishy abt tat.Then he will dig into his ice cream tubs with that farnie looking metal bar, slabbes on 4 chunks of icecream , still nutthin weird abt tat yet...... and.....(he will select one of thye actions below)
When you finally grab the cone he lifts his bar, the icecream continues to be stuck to the icecream n the ice cream continues to be stuck to the cone and when you look at your hands, it's a empty cone....
You give him a "hey give me my ice cream look" then he scoops 1 more scoop hits the row of turkish bells, passes the ice cream to you and when u wanna grab the cone the ice cream remains stuck on the bar and you realise the cone is gone....he distracts you when he hits the bell to remove the cone....
he then gives you the icecream by sticking he icecream onto his metal bar... he keeps rotating his bar and you will juz keep missing the cone.....
He holds the cone at ard the tip and when you actually go grab the cone he tilts it and the icecream goes upside down.....
He will then end with wrapping ur ice cream cone and gives you sincerely with his hands.... by this time ur eyes will be filled with disbelief and you will feel paranoid tat he has sumthin fishy up his sleaves....
Well we went to the shop and had a wonderful lunch..... they i ordered a turkish pizza which has a super thin crust..... and Shaun ordered tat big rotating sausage which they thinly slice with some herbal rice.....
when it came for ice cream, i was thinking if we could ask 4 2 icecream at a shot n if we get too frustrated we could actuallt shaft it up to ths costume n he would have an extra addition to his outfit, sharp nipples..... Shaun was being fooled ard wif tat ice cream man....n i crossed my hands, gave him a dio look and didn't wanna play along n see wad can he do wifout my participation........ he got cared and gave me my ice cream.....
after tat we went to look 4 Shaun's mum as she was shopping.... but we end up pretending to be rich man and walked down the ailes with chanel n all the expensive brands along it.....bragging how many maids and butlers we have and me going to my northern mansion tat nite.......
Went to takashimaya and went around inpersonating wad the plushy Cookie monster would do when he sees elmo..... Big bird seeing a smaller "big bird"....
Elmo:"Hi cookie!"
Cookie:" Wheres ur mama?" "I wanna eat ur mama"
Big bird:"Oh hi little, i mean big big, one down there."
Sunday Shaun,Weeleng n i had a wonderful dinner treat from Jasmine at the far east's turkish restraunt again... we started at 7.... left at 10..... we kept ordering and laughing at the jokes we read which i bought from lucky plaza that day..... laughing throughout the whole time....piling our salad bowls as high as mountains....
Monday we had practice at church.... and i missed the fashion runway show at 10... haiz....
Tuesday..... slacking at home.....
Wedsday was very drama..... we had a appearance at the yuhua CC.... finished at 10.... and wanted to rush home for America's best top model..... however Truddy, Chit, Jas were all so fascinated wif the huge tree which was flown over from finland..... and taking loads of pictures......and it was abt 1020 when we left tat place....and i rushed home with a cab.... and onli could see the last 30minz.....
Thursday..... our teen cell had a christmas dinner and i had to make konyaku jelly..... farnie thing is that many people felt it was not sweet and some felt it too sweet....=/ hmmm.....
Shaun was rushing me that day and i forgot Wayne's prezzie....so cooincidetally he reminded me in sms that we muz remember to bring our gifts and go Zhen ming's house..... oh man it felt terrible.....
Friday my family had a super huge dinner at Swensense..... suprisingly there were no bible reading and everyone went to sleep...... ahhh i wonder if they put on any extra KGs....hmm.... as 4 me i read the joke book till quite late..... laughing at the lame "yo mamaa so fat" and "yo mamaa so stupid"
Sat was a disaster..... didn't plan to go church to sing.... dressed up nicely and Shaun called me and we talked over 30minz juz to convince me to go on.....=/ really frustrated over it....arghhh......
Then we disturbed Jas by changing the dumb blond in the joke book to her name..... and the "yo mamaa" to "Jas is so fat....." disturbed her till crazy......at first she wanted to hear more jokes, soon she wants it to stop....mwahahahaha evil us.....
J O E| 2:46 AM |
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-=| Makeover Extreme |=-
Well on the 14 of dec i went to the hair salon and did my hair, since my mum wanted to touch up her roots... hehe... don't be deceived with her young looks and brownish hair, without that dyed brown hair, she will look even older then the old people tat she is taking care of in the old folks home where she is the administrator. Seriously speaking her hair is actually already greyish white, and suprisingly some old people could still maintain their real black hair which is real, i mean they didn't go do anything to their hair because there are still a few white and grey strands of hair.
Well the hair stylist and i was trying to persuade her to bleach her hair white and dye it ash, it's so happening in japan for people to have such colour, and her hair is not to say it is very black or wad so ash should look cool on her... but she dares not try it.. however to step into her shoes and think, the bitchy old people in her church would start bitching of her going havoc and stuff, "imoral woman" "so havoc ah", y dun look at those bitchy old woman, they have white hair yet they they dye it real solid black and when it grows out they buy their own mixture and fill in the white hair themselves, causing patches all over, because they cannot see their back and the colour where they patch their roots is wrong i will see 3 colours, the white undyed roots, brown repatched colour and a black tip because of the previous dying..... they look disasterous. And my dad won't be comfortable sleeping next to a Bai fa mo nu(white hair ghost)... even when she first permmed her hair, she took some time to get use sleeping next to a poodle.
Aniwayz at first the stylist was suggesting rebonding my hair and i can maintain my length... then i flipped through some magazines and voila, behold infront of me is this guy wif mohawk... that was a curly version of a mohawk... and poof! my hair was trimmed and layered and the stylist began to drench my hair with some setting oil and twisted my hair with some alluminium foil to create the curls.... they twist it so hard that it felt like they were pulling my hair.....well there were lotsa prosedures... and it ended with me lying at the sink for more then 15 minutes, so bored that i had to daze at the celing, and the i was looking at the square exaust removal thingy and there a apparel design came into my mind..... well i hope it will help me to enter some inistitution...
After my hair was done, the stylist recomended highlights and yeah they started coating my hair with those hair dye. and poof! my hair was havoc~ly done.....
Well now my voice is bad, hair is 2 loud and i've gotta help Shaun with the service on sat, Sabbath...
Talking abt helping Shaun, today i'm at 107fm to be "shaun maid", and from morning to afternoon all i've gotta do is to load CDs and keep Cds.... and i get 10 bucks.... well it's good money, pluz have good food brought by faith...... haha.... aniwayz i guess tats my week......
J O E| 9:16 PM |
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-=| feeling Sickly |=-
J O E| 8:59 PM |
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-=| Dos and don'ts of exterminating cockroaches |=-
So when you do see a flying cockroach, be sure to send it flying to heaven before it spills its evil spawns out!!!
To totally eliminate their race, after killing the pregnant cockroach, use alcohol to burn it, so as to totally wipe out the eggs ( remember the movie Aliens, where Sigourney Weaver burns the eggs?? ) thats the only way to totally kill out these roaches.
Do not, I repeat, do not attempt to flush the dead cockroach down the toilet without burning it or totally squashing it! The eggs will still hatch and climb out to spread their evil around and you'll have more to deal with in time.
Also, do not use insecticide on the pregnant cockroach cos it will only help the eggs to develop resistance against the insecticide in future.
J O E| 1:01 AM |
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-=| A short post to update the past few weeks.... |=-
Enough of boring facts, during these few weeks I went to KL for a weekend with my mum and sis, leaving my dad all alone in Singapore. I wasn’t supposed to go with my mum and sis; however I squeezed my way through with them. Why? You may ask. It is a horrifying night mare to live with my dad all alone under the same roof. And I’m not exaggerating, he will bombard me with thousands of questions which he feels that the things that I say and the way I put stuff is wrong, then a huge debate will start. Usually he starts such conversations because he is too bored and feels that I have nothing better to do, so he doesn’t gets his points right, and not only that he keeps changing topics as he knows that he cannot beat me in talking and ends up crossing over his own points and ends up he doesn’t know what is he arguing about. And since I know my stand and what I believe in, he ends up heavily emotionally wounded. And not only that, he would look for odd jobs which no one would actually care throughout the year and asks me to do, giving a lame excuse saying that since my mum is not at home so I must contribute to the family, like as if he does.
Many people say that he is my dad so I must respect him, but I don’t think so, since he keeps talking about heaven and stuff, next time when we go to heaven no one will be anyone’s father and everyone will be equal, only God is our father in heaven, and we should get use to that level, if not next time we won’t be use to it.
Even when we return home and bought stuff home, he did try and stir up some arguments like saying we shouldn’t buy these tau sa bia, “S’pore also have, you buy in M’sia for wad?” “This pastry has so much egg yolks, it will clot your arteries and get heart attack.” Hey hey, slow down, it’s the famous tau sa bia from Malaysia you know, despite all that he said, he was the one who ate a lot of those heart attack causing tau sa bia.
KL wasn’t really that fun, because we just stayed in a hotel and just shopped in Mega Mall. That mall was huge and it was something like the paragon in S’pore, most of those high class shops are located in there, like top shop, P&Co, and many which I can’t remember. But particularly I found one of their shops particularly interesting, it’s a shoe shop selling all sorts of shoes, and guess the shop name. It’s called “Lang shoe” or something like so, if you don’t get it, “Lang” is pretty in Cantonese, so whatever shoes which are sold in this shop is going to be “Lang”, but it’s totally the opposite, ahh whatever!~
One thing that disgusts me the most is the western food stall in mega mall, in the picture produced above the stall, it looks super appetizing however that is just a versad. My sis and I are cheated. The chicken was sliced up into thin stripes like the chicken rice stall in S’pore. There were no fries or cold slaw, just a few slices of cucumber and tomato, which had black spots on it; I guess they didn’t wash it. However there is soup, those soup in those china mugs with a thin slice of dough skin over the mug, this was what I saw in the picture, however when the real soup arrived it looked horrible, it was in those jail looking aluminum cup with this harden wanton skin on top. When I lift up that wanton skin looking lid whatsoever the soup looked as if it was some chemistry lab discharge, it looked exactly like the o levels chemistry practical’s test results, it is a white precipitate in clear solution, I suppose the clear solution is water and the white precipitate is some soup mix which they were too kiam to use.
The motive for me to KL is to look out for their apparel being sold their so I can create my 10 piece pictorial to go for the interview in Laselle. Well I did many rough sketches but I do not think I can use them, cause they are already in the market and it’s no more original, however it was a great reference, I shall burn mid night oil and sketch my ideas out. Ahhh~ I wonder if I can even enter Laselle, hopefully I’ll score well.
Basically what I was doing at home all these while was to watch all the tv I can and sleep all I want, I guess it’s time to flip the newspaper and find some job openings which might help me in my CV in future.
B!0
Name : Joel Xiang Desheng P3RS0N@L!TY
Personality : Flamboyant T@g W!SH3S 3M@!l CURR3NT M00D W3@TH3R F00T PR!NTS !N 3 S@nd R@D!0 ST@T!0NS P@ST R3CORDS L!NKS
DOB : 19th May 1988
Age : 19+
Height : 1.73++m
Weight : Abt 60kg
Zodiac : Dragon
Horroscope : Taurus
Fav Sports : Breathing exercises on the bed every night(snore)
Fav colour : Blue, silver, black
Fav things : Vintage looking stuff...
Hates : People who commands me to do anything
Worst habits : Talking back, bitching...
Best Habits : Obeys house rules
How do u relax : Bitching, complaining, vibrate my ear drums with sound waves from my disc man
One thing tat no one noes abt? : i'm Sentimental...
Three words 2 describe me : Rude Noisy Freak
One liner tat i'm most proud of : Being kind to your enemy means to be cruel to yourself
Moto in life : Look 4 a goal n strife hard
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